Wedding Etiquette & Traditions Every Bride & Groom Needs to Know

​If you grow up in a home where there are many celebrations, parties, and weddings, you may grow up knowing a lot of wedding traditions and general etiquette as a guest. There are many wedding traditions to consider when getting married, and many to consider when attending a wedding as a guest.

It’s important to know wedding traditions and etiquette in order to avoid unnecessary misunderstandings. This guide will provide detailed information on wedding traditions and etiquette to be the most considerate wedding guest or wedding party attendant.

We have also covered other pieces of etiquette information on our blog here,  here, and here. Why do we talk so much about traditions and etiquette? Because it matters and can make a big difference in the wedding celebration for the bride, groom, and everyone involved.

1. Announce appropriately. When getting married, be sure to inform your family and close friends before sharing the news on social media. Today, it’s common to make the big announcement on social media, but that can leave friends and family feeling very hurt if they learn the news along with “the rest of the world.”

2. Don’t steal the spotlight. Do not upstage another person’s announcement with your own. Invited to a birthday party, engagement party, or other celebration? This is not the time to announce your engagement. Save that for another day. Today is their day to celebrate.

3. Who pays for what? Generally, the bride’s family pays for the wedding, the groom’s family pays for the rehearsal dinner, and the honeymoon. The couple pays for the rings. The wedding party pays for their own attire. This Brides.com article breaks down the traditional roles of who pays for what in even greater detail.

4. Guest list. When creating the guest list, always include both members of a married couple. This also applies if the couple is engaged or has been together for many years.

5. Kids are great at weddings. If you decide to have a kid-free wedding, though, be sure to make that incredibly clear on the invitations and the wedding website. If you invite one child, invite them all. It is rude and inconsiderate to invite one child but not all of the children. Many times this happens because older children are no longer considered children, but the perception of the single kid who is excluded is that they are not wanted. This is insensitive to the entire family.

6. Invite early. Some etiquette rules suggest sending invitations as early as 12 weeks out from the wedding date. The minimum you should consider sending out printed invitations is 8 weeks. The earlier that people have details, the better they can plan their attendance. A digital invitation can always be sent first so that people can reply digitally, and then send a printed invitation later.

7. Travel plans. Inviting guests who will need to travel to the wedding requires that hosts provide information related to local accommodations. One option is to work with a hotel and provide a room block, but another option is to simply provide contact information for the best local options.

8. Registry. Creating a registry with all price points included ensures that you will receive gifts you like and want, as well as gifts that people with varying budgets can afford. It is also common to create a fund-type registry to allow guests to contribute to a specific goal with cash. This can be a honeymoon fund, home fund, travel fund, or other big purchase that the bride and groom will be saving toward. Honeyfund is a great option for saving for a honeymoon.

9. Thank you notes. In general, thank-you notes should be sent out within 3 weeks of receiving a gift. Once the gift is received and opened, promptly write the thank-you note. Not only is it considered thoughtful and considerate to the gift giver, but it also eliminates the stress of having many thank you notes to write at one point in the future. Prompt writing of thank-you notes once a gift is received is both courteous and kind. Those who give gifts deserve a thank you and a confirmation that the gift was received.

10. Dress code. If there is a specific dress code that you would like to follow for your wedding, it is important to make that abundantly clear on the invitation. Guests generally prefer more information so they can arrive appropriately dressed to a special occasion. If you fail to provide this information, guests may arrive under or over dressed to the celebration. The more detail you provide, the more comfortable and appropriately dressed your guests will be. Provide specific details like these:

    1. No black. No red. You can insert any specific color you do not wish to have at your wedding.

    2. Semi-formal.

    3. No jeans.

    4. Garden party attire.

    5. Beach formal.

    6. Black tie

    7. Cocktail attire

    8. Festive attire

11. Clear expectations for the bridal party. One stellar bride we worked with created a PowerPoint document of the entire event with links to outfit options for the entire bridal party in order to make it easy and clear for all involved parties. Providing detailed information with clear expectations is necessary and helpful. The more information you provide to people up front, the fewer questions you will have and the more clarity your bridal party has to make decisions they are required to pay for as a bridal party member.

12. Cash bars should be avoided. If you are considering a cash bar, don’t. Yes, liquor is expensive, so find other options that fit your budget. Set aside an amount of money in the budget for alcohol so that guests at an event (wedding, birthday, anniversary, or shower) are not required to pay for their own alcoholic drinks. Search for other vendors or limit the types of alcohol served in order to fit the budget. It’s perfectly acceptable to have a dry wedding where no alcohol is served at all, but asking guests to pay is inconsiderate.

13. A rehearsal dinner is a welcome party. It can be a challenge for brides, grooms, and the immediate family to really enjoy and connect with all guests at the wedding. As a result, many brides and grooms are now including the out-of-town guests and many others in the rehearsal dinner as more of a welcome party. This gives the extended family the opportunity to visit one more night over a nice meal.

14. Rehearsal. Yes, you do need a rehearsal. Even if your ceremony is more relaxed, you will need a brief rehearsal to ensure that your second groomsmen doesn’t stop at the wrong spot on the entrance and so that the bridal party enters in the correct order. When you see a wedding ceremony that looks romantic and effortless, it is because there was careful planning ahead of time that allowed for it to look beautiful and effortless.

15. Wedding party websites are helpful. If you’re feeling the urge to resist a wedding website, please consider these reasons why you should have one. A wedding website consolidates all of the details about the wedding in a larger space than the printed invitation. Whatever is not disclosed on the printed invitation, guests will question and ask you or the person responsible for collecting the RSVPs. Wedding websites provide information to guests so they don’t have to call you to get the answer. Wedding websites provide a quick and easy way to refresh guests’ memories on where this event takes place, what time, what to wear, etc. Finally, wedding websites provide a quick and easy digital way to collect RSVPs without using someone’s phone number or a return RSVP card, which takes longer and can get lost.

There are many traditions surrounding weddings that can be tailored to your specific desires as bride and groom. Being aware of the traditions and the required etiquette doesn’t mean you have to follow those ideas, but it does give you an idea of what guests may already be anticipating or expecting. If you’ve never attended many weddings, you simply may be unaware of all of the ins and outs of such a celebration.

At Royal Affairs Ballroom, we strive to provide a stress-free experience for our brides and grooms. Call us today at 972-221-6565 to learn more about our venue and package pricing.